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This forum has me in tears :( - Page 2


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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 08-25-2012, 02:55 PM
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Thank you Nelly.

I'm just in shock seeing how long all these visas take to get. I feel physically sick right now thinking that we will not be able to be together for a long, long time.



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Old 08-25-2012, 03:47 PM
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Don't worry too much about it. After that first meeting things will fall into place. After my first 3 weeks in Australia meeting my partner face to face for the first time, he actually quit his job to come to The Netherlands for a year while I finished my university degree and got ready to emigrate. By the time we moved to Australia we'd been together for 15 months already, passing the minimum for de facto partner visa, and we were going stronger every day and now we are nearly hitting the 2 year mark. You work it out as you go to make it work. Your partner becoming an American citizen would help you a lot - how long is the process?

And if I may suggest it - if you meet for the first time and everything feels right, you might want to considering staying with him for a while until you are both ready to come to Australia. I don't know what kind of work you do and/or how easy it would be for you to quit and come back and find a job months later... but if you can pull it off you might want to consider it. Look into your options for the US and see if that makes you feel any better about the future?

Just remember that if there is real love, there is always a way - you just need to be stubborn, have patience and do what you have to do to figure things out for yourself, and the immigration business will fall into place. When I first came to Australia to meet my partner I didn't even know about visas - honestly - my travel agency had to remind me to get a tourist visa or I wouldn't have even done that (I have mostly traveled inside Europe and am a European citizen)... by the time he came to visit me on a tourist visa we didn't even know what Working Holiday or Partner visa were. You just figure and fit as you go.

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Old 08-26-2012, 01:18 PM
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Thanks for the encouraging words Nelly

I've certainly considered going there, but the fact that I have a good, secure job here, and no options for a working visa for the United States means it really isn't an option.

I really need to keep my job here as that will be what will support us if he decided to move here on a permanent basis (which is what we will pursue if we still feel the same after a holiday visit together).

What a complicated process this all is. I am completely overwhelmed by it all after reading a lot on here the last few days.

I think we need to work on his US citizenship and get that in the works, seems like everything will be MUCH easier if he is not a citizen of a high risk country.

I'm feeling very daunted!


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Old 08-27-2012, 12:34 AM
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My friend had a mexican boyfriend residing in mexico who was granted visas to come visit here in oz, and im pretty sure he wasnt hugely financial. Sorry i dont know what visa he got it was a few years ago. And they never ended up doing the whole partner thing but he did visit for a few months at least twice.
Just do your research and go for it with a good application for tourist.
And if he does everything right on the first one itll be easier to get the second.
Also if he were denied maybe u could meet up in hawaii, halfway, neutral ground etc etc first before he starts the us citizen thiing

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Old 08-27-2012, 12:40 AM
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Thank you for your response Holly. It is reassuring to hear of other Mexican citizens being approved. Makes me feel more positive, thank you!

We will be making sure he does everything my the letter if he does get a tourist visa, I'll be so thankful just for him to come for a holiday and enjoy Queensland with him

All the rest of it will fall into place if he can just come visit to start. I will update when we know!


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Old 08-28-2012, 12:41 PM
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Thank you, Nelly. I really appreciate all the advice and kind words of support


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Old 08-28-2012, 01:33 PM
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Hi kangaroogirl,

I just want to commiserate with you, because I also felt completely hopeless when I realised just how difficult the process was.

I first met my husband in his country four years ago, and while we were only in the same place for a month we knew that we wanted to get married. I had to go back to Australia because I was still studying (only half way through, in fact), and at the time I promised him that I would buy his ticket to visit me in Australia on a tourist visa.

I had heard that the immigration process was strict so for a little while I resisted looking up the DIAC website and reading anything. Then, I couldn't take it anymore and finally had to know what we were up against and started reading... It almost killed me. I was travelling alone at the time (in yet a different country) and I couldn't even walk back to my hotel from the internet cafe... I just broke down on a street corner and couldn't stop crying. I was also a wreck for the first month or so after I got back, because there was basically no way, and I mean no way, that we could be together in Australia at that time. I researched thoroughly and realised that PMV was not an option because our story was pretty far-fetched and I knew it'd be unlikely that a case officer would believe it since we'd known each other for so little time, and plus he was from a (very) high-risk country. He also didn't have anything to his name (neither did I at the time) so there was not even a chance for a tourist visa. And then the cost to apply for a partner visa? Back then it was "only" about $1500. It seemed absolutely ludicrous! I felt as though I had no options to take.

I lost my appetite, I lost interest in study, in life, in everything really, and just wanted to remain asleep the whole time - blissfully ignorant of life. But I pushed myself to go back to work and earn something, reasoning that at least I could go back to his country myself to see him again - but that would still be almost a year away. Realising that I'd met the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and being taken from him again so quickly without any guarantee of seeing him again, well, it was just devastating.

Long story short, I waited the 9 months of the academic year and flew back the day after my exams. I stayed four months, we got married, but a month later we had to part again for another six months as I still had to finish my studies! So it's been like this, back and forth and back and forth, for the past four years, but now I am living in his country more or less full-time. But it's hard here.

Anyway, once we realised that our circumstances were better and we had a lot of evidence of our relationship and a lot of time behind us, we finally decided to apply a couple of months ago. But the thought that one single unsympathetic case worker could throw it all away just sickens me - and then the only recourse is paying another 1500 dollars for an appeal that could be up to 16 months away?? .......I have no words.

There are many things that seem unfair about the official process to begin with (let's begin with the 2 grand un-refundable fee and waits of up to 12 months - for crying out loud!) and then reading people's stories here and hearing how some applications (from high-risk countries) get thrown out on the whim of some embassy staff member... oh, it's just too much to bear.

I hope that your situation works out and that you won't have to spend as much time as I did (at least he's almost got US citizeship! that'll be a big plus ). But I'm here for you and I completely understand your frustrations

All the best of luck to you both xx

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Last edited by Adventuress; 08-28-2012 at 02:08 PM.

  #18 (permalink)  
Old 08-28-2012, 05:45 PM
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Hi Kangaroogirl,

Am from a high risk country (African). My first travel to Australia i had no money to finance my trip. But i applied for the tourist visa and my fiance(then just my girlfriend) sponsored me. I had a simple job. Did not even present my bank account statement but my fiancee did. And i was granted the visa in just couple of weeks. Maybe the advantage was that we had already met as she stayed in my country for a year. But don't give up now before you even try !!!!

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  #19 (permalink)  
Old 08-28-2012, 11:52 PM
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Unhappy

Quote:
Originally Posted by Adventuress View Post
Hi kangaroogirl,

I just want to commiserate with you, because I also felt completely hopeless when I realised just how difficult the process was.

I first met my husband in his country four years ago, and while we were only in the same place for a month we knew that we wanted to get married. I had to go back to Australia because I was still studying (only half way through, in fact), and at the time I promised him that I would buy his ticket to visit me in Australia on a tourist visa.

I had heard that the immigration process was strict so for a little while I resisted looking up the DIAC website and reading anything. Then, I couldn't take it anymore and finally had to know what we were up against and started reading... It almost killed me. I was travelling alone at the time (in yet a different country) and I couldn't even walk back to my hotel from the internet cafe... I just broke down on a street corner and couldn't stop crying. I was also a wreck for the first month or so after I got back, because there was basically no way, and I mean no way, that we could be together in Australia at that time. I researched thoroughly and realised that PMV was not an option because our story was pretty far-fetched and I knew it'd be unlikely that a case officer would believe it since we'd known each other for so little time, and plus he was from a (very) high-risk country. He also didn't have anything to his name (neither did I at the time) so there was not even a chance for a tourist visa. And then the cost to apply for a partner visa? Back then it was "only" about $1500. It seemed absolutely ludicrous! I felt as though I had no options to take.

I lost my appetite, I lost interest in study, in life, in everything really, and just wanted to remain asleep the whole time - blissfully ignorant of life. But I pushed myself to go back to work and earn something, reasoning that at least I could go back to his country myself to see him again - but that would still be almost a year away. Realising that I'd met the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and being taken from him again so quickly without any guarantee of seeing him again, well, it was just devastating.

Long story short, I waited the 9 months of the academic year and flew back the day after my exams. I stayed four months, we got married, but a month later we had to part again for another six months as I still had to finish my studies! So it's been like this, back and forth and back and forth, for the past four years, but now I am living in his country more or less full-time. But it's hard here.

Anyway, once we realised that our circumstances were better and we had a lot of evidence of our relationship and a lot of time behind us, we finally decided to apply a couple of months ago. But the thought that one single unsympathetic case worker could throw it all away just sickens me - and then the only recourse is paying another 1500 dollars for an appeal that could be up to 16 months away?? .......I have no words.

There are many things that seem unfair about the official process to begin with (let's begin with the 2 grand un-refundable fee and waits of up to 12 months - for crying out loud!) and then reading people's stories here and hearing how some applications (from high-risk countries) get thrown out on the whim of some embassy staff member... oh, it's just too much to bear.

I hope that your situation works out and that you won't have to spend as much time as I did (at least he's almost got US citizeship! that'll be a big plus ). But I'm here for you and I completely understand your frustrations

All the best of luck to you both xx
Oh Adventuress! Thank you for sharing your story, it has me in tears again for you, and for what might lay ahead for me.

Once you file the application for Partner Visa, don't you get a temporary visa so he can come back and wait for it to be processed? I see you applied in June.....no temporary visa yet?

All of this is just so confusing.....but I want to know now so at least I can fully understand what the future may hold.

I'm happy for you that you are at least able to be together over there for now. If I didn't have debts to service and some sick family here in Australia I'd be over there already with him......we've been completely in love since February when we met online.

We speak for about 6 hours a day on Skype (I know.....it's ridiculous)...I've changed all my sleep patterns so I can be awake when he is and we can "hang out" haha. I hate living like this.....but then I feel absurd because we have not even MET in person......but he's my soul mate, and I know that without a doubt.

*Sigh*.


  #20 (permalink)  
Old 08-29-2012, 12:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zamaussie View Post
Hi Kangaroogirl,

Am from a high risk country (African). My first travel to Australia i had no money to finance my trip. But i applied for the tourist visa and my fiance(then just my girlfriend) sponsored me. I had a simple job. Did not even present my bank account statement but my fiancee did. And i was granted the visa in just couple of weeks. Maybe the advantage was that we had already met as she stayed in my country for a year. But don't give up now before you even try !!!!
Hi Zamaussie, thank you for sharing your story - this gives me hope that he will at least get the tourist visa so we can see eachother soon!

Did you have the "No Further Stay" condition applied to your tourist visa? And how long did they give you on that Visa?

I'm not sure if he is best to apply for a 3 month, or 6 month? I'd love him to get a 6 month visa, but I'm concerned it might not get approved if he asks for too much!

Any advice?


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