How do u feel when u see a visa issue after u have been waiting so long?

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How do u feel when u see a visa issue after u have been waiting so long?


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Old 05-25-2013, 07:13 AM
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How do u feel when u see a visa issue after u have been waiting so long?

I know the correct thing to do is be happy for them but all I seem to do is cry every time I see another visa issue specially when it seems there history or evidence seems so much less than our own. I just loose it and think when will it be our turn? What did we do to deserve to be treated this way? After one racist refusal of our 300' 15 month wait with no end in sight for mrt hearing, 6 months into our second 300 visa, maybe I'm suffering pst traumatic stress syndrome or maybe I'm just a horrible person.. How does everyone else feel, really, specially the long termers? Nd pls don't judge me til u read my other posts nd see what happened to us.

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Old 05-25-2013, 08:38 AM
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I just responded to this on another thread where you mentioned this. I can only imagine how frustrating this process has been for you. I'd be so angry!

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Old 05-25-2013, 11:48 AM
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The way I look at it is that I cannot change what has happened, only how I respond to it. Being upset about other's being approved ahead of me will not get my visa approved any more quickly. It will make me feel more anxious and unhappy though. So I love to see 'Visa Granted!' threads and celebrate with the people who have been reunited with their loved ones.

This is sort of a personal mantra that I carry with me all the time. My default is to be happy for others and expect the best from the world. I'm not sure if this attitude attracts and creates great things or if it just changes my perception to allow most things to be great. Either way, I can share in the joy of others and it only makes me happy and hopeful for the day when I can post a 'visa granted!!" thread myself.

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Old 05-25-2013, 12:03 PM
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What can I say, chicken999 - you know how I feel.

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Old 05-25-2013, 05:42 PM
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I want to be happy for the others I really do but the tears still come. Got to work on that I guess . Yes sunnysmile I do no how u feel

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Old 05-27-2013, 09:20 PM
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I will celebrate that moment with my friends


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Old 05-29-2013, 09:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chicken999 View Post
I want to be happy for the others I really do but the tears still come. Got to work on that I guess . Yes sunnysmile I do no how u feel
I can imagine how you feel, we had been waiting for a partner visa for 13 months and there was always this fear in the back of our mind "what if..."...
But, at least we were together in Australia, being separated must be awful.

Your question actually exceeds the advices of this forum, as you are asking questions about feelings... and everyone deals with this matter differently.

Whitney from the forum replied really nicely, and I am thinking very much alike.

We had been waiting for my partner's visa for more than a year, and all the time there were numerous posts about people being approved much much quicker. We were happy for them, and at the same time we were saying to ourselves we should be patient as we did everything properly. We went over our case hundreds of times, knowing we sent in proper evidence calmed us down. We knew there were others who have been waiting for even longer, so we persuaded ourselves not to worry and not to check VEVO more than 5 times a day . Seriously, you wouldn't believe how much energy we spent persuading ourselves to behave normally, go to work and behave like all is in order. We read somewhere that current processing time could be 15-18 months, so we prepared ourselves we could wait for quite some time and tried no to worry constantly.

Unfortunately, your case is really awful, luckily you took the matter into your own hands and you and your partner are closer to the visa. But what happened happened, focus on the solution and not on the problem, swap the thoughts in your head for happy thoughts... I know it sounds silly, but that's what saved us, not just in the past 13 months, but in many other much more serious situations.
Don't cry when you see others' visas being granted, try to be happy for them cause you know you might be next.
Don't loose the energy on immigration, don't allow yourself to be even more sad because of them, they did enough damage already, don't let them destroy your everyday life any longer. Your visa is being processed, there's nothing you can do this exact moment, so it's better to try and be at list a little bit content (happy) instead of depressed.

I wanted to say that there are a lot of us who understand what you're going through. Keep your eye on a goal, and try to be positive, your partner needs you, too.

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Old 05-29-2013, 11:56 AM
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Bma that was one of the most thoughtful and kind posts I have ever read. Thank u so much for taking the time to write it. I'm keeping spirits up now cause I'm about to book another 3 week trip to Ghana for end July. It's good to have short term goals to keep focused on something else. Another 3500$ on the old credit card lol oh well my man assures me we will pay it off together once he is here.

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Old 05-29-2013, 12:05 PM
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Fantastic! Maybe by July you'll be bringing him back to Aus at the end of your holiday!

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Old 05-29-2013, 12:21 PM
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Whitney wouldn't that be a dream come true! By the end of my holiday it will be 8 months since lodgement so don't like my chances but u never know.

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